Life Lessons From Sparring

i sparred again yesterday.

my first impression was that i sucked.

my first time doing tae kwon do was in the ATF/ITF style. the type of sparring is different. it's point sparring and you break once a point is scored.

WTF style, however, is different. it's continuous point sparring, full contact. i've done a little bit of that style years ago. my most memorable moment was when i kicked my coach in the nuts by accident (sorry mr. kim). but that was it. in this style, you can win by a knockout.

the style of sparring that i'm used to doesn't translate well to WTF. what gets you success in one will almost surely get you killed in the other. i was kicked around, pushed around, and outclassed. at one point i became visibility frustrated.

"are you okay?" the instructor asked

"no!" I said emphatically. "i don't know what to do! I feel stupid!"

the instructor's voice went from pushy to encouraging. "look, it's okay to get hit. be strong, get out there, and do your best. practice what we worked on earlier."

something about me is that i don't like doing things wrong. i just don't. my last name is wright for crying out loud. i was enraged by my lack of progress and perceived failure. i was salty the rest of the practice. having an injured foot and slightly bruised shins didn't help.

but when i got home, i realized something.

i performed a lot better than my first time sparring in march. that time, i spent most of the fight running. this time, i sparred three different people. even got some decent hits in. of course, i won't be able to beat them for a while. they have more experience than i do. but if i could magically spar myself from a month ago, i would have beaten my former self.

i've actually gotten better.

i improved, but i didn't notice my improvement because i was gauging myself by someone else's talents and skills. that made me diminish my own strides.

i should learn not to do that. and so should you.