transformation

i feel like i'm in this really awesome place in my walk with god. i can actually feel the lord adjusting me in particular areas.  i think this is what walking in grace feels like.  i can honestly say that i'm being transformed by god and it feels wonderful.  i'm looking a little more like jesus...and that's quite alright with me :-)

i think that reading this book, "the spirit of the disciplines" by dallas willard, helped a lot.  the one thing it brought home for me was this:  in order to live the life that jesus lived, you need to do what he did.  spiritual life involves ourselves and our BODIES.  what we do with it matters.  it's our bodies that we use to operate with in the world, so if spiritual life bypasses your body, you really aren't getting all that you can.

i don't know why, but understanding that has done wonders for me.  i think that when we think of our bodies we think of evil, perversion, and sin.  of course, without the help of god that's what we will ultimately do.  however, our bodies are the location and center of our life.  jesus wants to use our bodies, do that special work in us, so that the resulting behaviors will actually BE US.  it won't be a fake version of holiness, but a desire that is birthed by the grace of god that will ultimately cause YOU to live right.

i think sometimes we equate suppression with transformation. i believe that one can be transformed, which will cause you to suppress some things.  but, just suppressing sin without leading to heart change isn't the full picture.

i'm going to look up some scriptures soon to get some scriptural basis.  this is one of the rare times when my experience has come ahead of me having a text to come from!

Music

something that a lot of people may not know about me is that i like music.  particularly, i like singing.  i grew up in a household where music was normal.  my dad has tons of records.  every so often, he would turn the tv off and play his old records in the house.  that's how i learned about cameo and the song flashlight.

a large amount of people on both sides of my family either played an instrument or sang...and in a lot of cases both.  i remember when my cousins and i were all together in virginia one year.  we had to have a sing-off.  the rational was this:  if you were gladys dorsey's grandchild...you HAD to be able to at least harmonize.  if you couldn't harmonize, you were clearly adopted.  our mothers would all be in the kitchen and suddenly break out into a song as if they practiced.

here's some of the breakdown of the music talent/experience in my family:

mom: sings and clarinet

dad: drums

elia: flute

me: drums, choir, praise teams

nanna: played piano, and organ, and sang

aunt karen: sings

aunt carolyn: sings

derrick: trombone, sings

daniel:  keyboard, guitar

mind you, me, my mom, and my sister have ALL won the same band award.  hilarious.  that only happens in asbury park.

anyway, i like music.  music is one of the ways i connect to god.  when i was struggling with being interested in church, singing on the praise team was the only thing that kept me going.  i actually felt more spiritually edified from praise team practice than sunday service.  i think that's because singing for me involves my whole self connecting with god, and a message that doesn't really engage me during a service makes me go sleep.

with this said, don't expect me to appear somewhere with a record (lol).  i can carry a note pretty well....but verdell's solo gospel tour is NOT in the works.  but i enjoy singing to god and it helps me experience him on a daily basis.

how do you experience god?

Jewels and Jems

just felt led to share a god encounter that i had today.  i don't do this to seem super deep, but to hopefully encourage a deeper relationship with jesus!

i was praying with my eyes closed after reading my bible.  after meditating for a few minutes, i started to see something that looked like flashing lights (my eyes were still closed).  then, i could tell that the flashing light came from light bouncing off something else.  i realized that it was gold.  then i saw jems and types of precious stones.

then i heard god speak. "this is treasure," he said.  "and this is inside of you.  remember that."

MADE MY NIGHT! i just love jesus!  and he loves you too! #thatisall

christians and race pt.1

over the past few days, i've had a few conversations about christianity and race.  i think it's an interesting topic.  the conversation has inspired me, and at times exposed where we as people have healing that needs to take place.

i'll just start by saying this:  i believe that god loves ALL people...all colors, all races, all ethinic groups, etc.  i believe that jesus died to open the way for ALL people to be reconciled to god.  with that being said, i believe that god is glorified through all the cultural distinctives that are expressed through the various groups of people throughout the world.  africans worship differently from chinese...and that's fine.  the direction of the worship is more important that source.

i have a scholarly approach to my opinion as well.  this semester i had to write an exegetical paper on colossians 2:11-22.  to sum up a long story, the author of this book (yeah, a majority of scholars don't think it was paul #sorry) believed that christ's death took away the division that separated jews and gentiles.  These two distinct people groups, that were separated by the requirements of the law, were now (in Christ), merged together to create a new people group.  this new "race" so to speak all have a common father...GOD...who is also the Emperor of the Universe.  in the context of their unity they experience fellowship with their father.

i have trouble accepting a christian theology that excludes others, especially since most of the people that have that train of thought would be of the excluded group before christ (gentiles).  i'm all for maintaining and celebrating ethnicity, but not to the exclusion of others.  jesus paid the price for EVERY one to sit at the table.  i am very much an african american male....the ancestor of slaves and abused native americans...and my people consistently suffer today because of racial and systematic injustice.  i believe that god can and will deal with these situations, and i will be a part of it. 

i won't allow human error in the area of race to dictate my worship.  i won't turn my race into an idol to compensate for the fact that others hated it and still seek to oppress it.  my simple and childlike (and perhaps childish, but i'll let you decide) idea is this:  god is the father of lights...and light includes all the colors that we argue over so much.  so why worship one color when god is the sum of them all? 

i think i'll blog about this over the course of the week.  there are some more points i want to hit.